Dear Mom

Dear Mom,

Thank you for believing in me. Growing up we both know I was a big scaredy cat. I didn’t have any faith in myself when it came to anything. I wouldn’t try out of fear of failing. You told me every day though that you believed in me and I could do it no matter what it was.

Sure, you might think well yeah any mother would tell their kids to believe in themselves. That’s completely not true. Susan Smith, Diane Staudte, and Christy Sheats all brutally murdered their children. Now, I’m sure somedays you might have wanted to kill me but the important part is that you didn’t!

Instead, you taught me stepping out of my comfort zone wasn’t the end of the world. You taught me to be brave and chase my dreams. When I told you and dad I wanted to build my computer you fully believed I could do it. I was shaky on the whole idea. I sure as hell didn’t think I could do it. When I started reading and researching everything I possibly could I had you in the back of my mind. I wanted to make both you and dad proud.

Not once did you ever question whether or not I was wasting hundreds of dollars and was going to fry my computer. When I asked you if I should splurge and get a better part you didn’t complain I was wasting my hard earned money. You told me to follow whatever I wanted. I was working hard to build that computer and I should build it to my heart’s content. So I almost did, those darn GTX 1080s are just so expensive yet so beautiful.

I love that you’ll always listen to my silly rants about silly things. By silly rants I mean me talking about the Legend of Zelda and the lore behind it. I’m pretty sure you could explain the timeline split and what every game was about.

Speaking of Zelda do you remember when the first Breath of The Wild trailer came out? I was upstairs in my room on my laptop watching the game awards because there were rumors about a Zelda trailer. They went on a commercial break but said Nintendo was coming up next or something. I immediately ran downstairs and you were making dinner and watching a show. I told you what was going on and you paused it for me so I could watch the trailer on the TV. I was literally running all over the room because of how excited I was. I eventually sat down was but still jumping up and down in my seat out of excitement.

There was a bit of talking but then the trailer started playing. I’m pretty sure I started screaming and running around again. You didn’t yell at me either to sit down for acting like a crazy person. You let me run around like a crazy person because you knew how excited I was. That was back in December of 2014. I was a month away from being 15. I think the best part is that we both know even at 18 that’s how I’d still react.

I know dad being in Iraq wasn’t his choice, but thank you for taking care of me and Marisa. I know it wasn’t easy homeschooling Marisa and dealing with how evil of a sister she was. We both know however that I was the easiest and the smartest of your kids.

I was also the most caring of your children. I mean how old was I when I bought you that chocolate rose? Have any of your other children ever bought you a chocolate rose? I think not! I’ve always walked miles just to go buy you chocolate because I knew you were in a bad mood and needed to be cheered up.

I know I’ve messed up a lot but you’ve always gotten over it and loved me. Again, you didn’t have to. I’d like to repoint out that you didn’t kill me when I told you about Jordan as we were walking up to her. I’m Sorry.

Do you remember that night about a year ago when I was watching shooting stars memes? I was laying on the ground because I’d fallen off the couch and was laughing so hard I was crying. You didn’t understand why but you sat there and laughed at me. My humor doesn’t always make sense but that doesn’t mean you don’t laugh and my dumb jokes.

When I told you I didn’t want to go to college you found Praxis. You told me about it and I checked it out on a whim. It was exactly what I’d been talking about that I wish existed. There it was in all of its glory of existence. I doubted I’d get in but you told me I could get it.

I applied and a few days later I ran downstairs to you to tell you that I was moving onto the next part. You were so happy for me. This continued on until I finally got in. I ran to you telling you that I got in and you were excited for me. We both know the second I told you that all you saw was a timer on my head. I still do. Slowly counting the days until I’m moving out.

I know you’re worried about me and my health but I’ll be fine! Pinkies.

Thank you for always being there mom. Thank you for teaching me how to love with my big heart. Thank you for supporting me in everything I do even if you don’t completely agree with it. Thank you for working so hard to take care of all of us. Thank you for not giving up on me when I had.

I hope you have an amazing day.



P.S. I know you’re a couple days behind on my posts but I’m sure you’ll get to this one eventually 😉

P.S.S. Sorry for bad image quality I like this picture of us but it doesn’t fit the banner width.


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